Aaah! Relatives.

Study: Americans To Tire Of Relatives Earlier This Year

MILWAUKEE, Wis. (CAP)(CNN)(PETIN) - Hello from Milwaukee, Wisconsin. This is Anderson Cooper for Anderson Cooper 360º - Researchers at the International Living And Working Society have announced the results of their annual "Family & The Holidays" study. For the fourth year in a row, Americans will get tired of their relatives before Christmas even arrives. And that, I am told, will be at 4:42pm on December 23rd, to be exact.

"After 9/11, we saw FTF - the Family Tolerance Factor - jump to pre-1970 levels, but that was short-lived." InLaWS Director of Research Leonard Medway, told me. "Within a couple years, we were back to the downward trend we've been seeing since the Reagan administration."

Medway said also told me that he remembers chuckling with other researchers when the FTF Zero Tolerance Date first landed on Christmas itself, back in 1997.

"11:06am it was," said Medway. "It's like you're barely done opening presents and you just want Aunt Midge to get the hell out of your house. It's sad, really. Especially after all the trouble she went through to knit you that bright green and red sweater."

But the study is not without its critics. Libby Garvey at the Centers For Research And Sociological Study said the situation is nowhere near as dire as the numbers make it seem. But what does he know, Mr. Garvey, we found out is single, he's not dating anybody, man or woman, and his parents are misionaries who live in Uzbekistan.

"All families are different, yet InLaWS will gladly stereotype just to make an invalid point," said Garvey. "Our society doesn't need InLaWS. They're not bringing families together; they're tearing them apart."

The InLaWS study will be published in this month's issue of the journal Waiting Room, along with a CRaSS rebuttal.

Something to think about, huh? As your relatives file one or two at the time, or a whole band of yahoos makes their way to your dining room table for Thanksgiving.

Next, what will you get Aunt Midge for Christmas in return for that bright green and red sweater she gave you last year. We'll consult with Fanny Marie Johnson and her husband, Bruce, owners of a popular 99 cent store in Glendale, a suburb just north of Milwaukee downtown.

Stay tuned. We'll be right back.