Remember the Scar!

It was 2008 and everybody feared that Anderson's face might be scared, for life. Or worst, that he might have cancer. Fortunately neither happened.

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March 20, 2008 at 7:53 pm

Scandaltown = What REALLY caused Anderson Cooper’s facial disfiguration???

Posted by missjaneleo under Dreamboat, Hilarity, Politics, TV


The Associated Press is reporting that CNN’s Anderson Cooper recently had a cancerous mole removed from below his left eye, which would explain the red mark visible on his face over the past week. It WOULD, that is, if you BUY that story. I have a few other ideas. A list of possible (and I would argue, probable) causes of this facial sore:

♥ mountain lion mauling
♥ night terror + unkempt
♥ fingernails = inch-long face gash
♥ bagel-slicing mishap
♥ terrorist act
♥ counter-terrorist act
♥ fisticuffs with Larry King,
♥ backstage after the latter’s interview with Janet Jackson (nasty boys)
♥ rusty razor malfunction
♥ disastrous eye-lift plastic surgery scarring
♥ strategic distraction tactic to make viewers forget about his “conflict of interest on gay issues”? (Americans For Truth, you terrify me, btw)
♥ well-meaning but ill-executed attempt at increasing his rugged good looks (scars work for Seal, right?)

Anderson, your hair
shiny as the nighttime stars.
Silver fox, indeed.

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Peter's five cents' worth of probable causes for Anderson's scar:

♥ caught in between Julio Cesar Recio and Benjamin fighting for his heart
♥ fight with Charlie Rose. Anderson won, Charlie got a black eye
♥ fight with Rick Sanchez for Peter's attention
♥ playing silly games with Kelly Ripa
♥ Regis thought Anderson was stealing his job
♥ Bill O'Reilly when Anderson's ratings got too close to his
♥ Rick Sanchez showing Anderson how to avoid being attacked with a dagga, he failed
♥ a puppy
♥ a kitten
♥ a puppy and a kitten

My Haiku about Anderson:

Handsome and Talented
Born with a silver spoon
Watta catch!